Overcoming Timidity
Give Yourself A Champion Aura
I started out as a fat, motherless and fatherless, self sheltered, weak, timid, picked on, low class, poor white kid in an all black surrounding in South Side Chicago.
Back then I NEVER had ANY friends, ANY GIRLS, NO friend building skills.
I was awkward as fuck and weird until I started realizing I needed to grow to survive life and be at least normal.
That picture is me as a FRESHMAN in high school. I was lame as fuck, over weight and 5′ 5″. You can see that didn’t help my social skill building or getting girls.
So what I am saying is, no matter where you start from, even from the VERY BOTTOM, you can grow into a champion. That is why I made Smart Rapper. To help everyone become champions in their own way.
(I am also going to expand Smart Rapper to other things than music. You’ll see in the future!)
You need to understand that is all just has to be taken one day at a time. You don’t just become a champion over night. It all starts with hitting that punching bag 1 time and eventually you will have hit it 1 million times and you are damn near untouchable.
So you need to start learning all of the following skills and implementing them EVERY DAY to crack outside of your shell and become confident and out going. I do these as often as I can EVERY DAY.
1) Talk To People (Hi, nice shirt! Where’d you get that?)
Anytime you go ANYWHERE. Talk to AT LEAST one person. Idc who it is. And if you can’t think of anything to say, compliment their shoes, shirt or pants.
Not only should you do this to grow, but complimenting people makes their day better and you build up your Karma points. 😀
Talking to people like this will let you understand it’s not a scary thing to talk to ANYONE. The only reason the other person isn’t talking to you is because they have nothing to say to you. If they did, they would talk to you too. Don’t be scared for any reason.
This includes girls. They are JUST girls, don’t trip. I used to be nervous as fuck around girls. If they even sat near me I got almost shaky and weird. I’d say the dumbest possible things a guy can say around a girl. I was such a dumb ass. Get over it! You have a champion deep down in side you waiting to come out.
2) Posture
ALWAYS Walk upright, chest out, shoulders back and Keep your chin up. This instantly instills confidence in your naturally. You look smarter, more professional AND feel smarter and more professional as soon as you do this. Trust me…..
3) Smile
Smiling is a sign to people that you are friendly and not an enemy or threat to them. This makes them a lot more prone to speaking to you and being friendly.
Smiling also increases endorphins in your brain AS SOON AS YOU SMILE. Try it right now, smile as hard as you can and you’ll instantly feel just a tiny bit better.
Anytime I am feeling ANY BIT of negativity for any reason, I just smile for a minute.
I also smile in the mirror a couple times a day with perfect posture. This is to further instill it in me to KEEP it as a habit. I sit and work on my computer and music a lot. So I try not to slouch and do this to keep me on point!
4) Eye contact
Keeping eye contact with someone not only shows dominance and confidence, it shows respect when you are talking to them. This takes practice at first. ESPECIALLY if you’re timid. Now a days I don’t break eye contact with ANYONE. Even the 350 lb black guy at the gym gets eye contact until he looks away first.
I first practiced this by realizing I could stare into anyone’s eyes as they drive by me in the opposite lane going to the opposite direction in a car. What are they going to do, stop and U turn and come back and say something? I wish they would. Don’t worry about that.
Just stare right into peoples eyes as they drive by and keep eye contact until they are passed you. You pass like 200 cars a day. This is great practice.
I recommend only doing this when you are going under 15MPH and ESPECIALLY at stop lights. DRIVE SAFELY.
If you have an issue with this at first, buy sunglasses so they can’t see who or what you are staring at.
Here are some $6 glasses with FREE SHIPPING that look sick with any outfit. I wear these everyday. Check Them Out On Amazon Here
5) Take Up Space
Make it a habit to always walk NEAR or DIRECTLY by people. Don’t AVOID people.
When I am at the gym, I walk by the biggest guys on purpose to show I have no reason to avoid them. There is no fear in me.
This may sound a bit stupid, but this is an alpha male characteristic and I do it anytime there is an opportunity.
Don’t act tough, just take up space. If they say something, smile and compliment them.
6) Put yourself in situations to grow
I’m not talking about going to South Side Chicago and rolling out of the car and screaming ITS ME!
I’m talking about, go out to events, go out to parties, go out to bars and clubs if you can (you don’t have to drink) and be AROUND people.
A huge mistake I made was locking myself in a room and learning and working for years telling myself I’d have it all later, I’ll party later, I’ll work now!
While I may have gotten WAY more work done, I would have loved to have had fun and ALSO told myself I was working while having fun by being out there developing my people skills.
I go out every single weekend now, 2 days a week SPECIFICALLY to build my networking skills and NETWORK! I am growing more into a champion every day. And you can do the same my friend.
I sit in THIS room that I am in A LOT, working. Once a week I take my laptop and I work at Star Bucks, looking directly into the eyes of every person that walks in the door. Even the occasional super hot chick. 😀
7) Talking to people on the internet
Talk to a RANDOM person on the internet. This isn’t hard…. type and press enter! Practice complimenting and talking to these people online.
My immense amount of conversations with fans is probably what allows me to have my real life social skills I have today. You need those social skills too. Online you have more time to think about what you are going to say and how you are going to say it. Eventually you build up a catalog of responses that are your taglines and GOTO’s and you can use them in REAL LIFE.
Talk to a random girl on FB that you think is cute. If she doesn’t respond, OH WELL. What the worst that can happen, she ignores you? Who cares lol She only ignored you because 50 guys message her a day who had the balls to message her. Maybe you’re her type and you don’t even know it!!!
8) MOST IMPORTANTLY
Realize the reality is never as bad as your brain makes it seem
The person isn’t going to do ANYTHING you tell yourself they are. They aren’t going to laugh at you or say, why is this a nice shirt? The girl isn’t going to smack you and the guy isn’t going to spit on you.
If you just talk to people while smiling and being genuinely yourself, they are going to respond in some way. And after each conversation you learn more and more about HOW TO converse properly. That’s all there is to it. Practice makes perfect.
Your confidence is going to build with each and every single person you talk to.
Now ask your self how to fight your fears and do it. Good luck!
– NovAK